(CNN) — For most South Asians, the phrase “What will people say?” is all too familiar.
What will people say if you wear that revealing outfit? What will people say if you don’t pursue an advanced degree? What will people say if you marry someone outside of your religion? What will people say if you get a divorce?
You can swap in any hypothetical scenario that might spur societal judgment — the variations are endless.
Sahaj Kaur Kohli, a licensed therapist and founder of the online mental health community Brown Girl Therapy, knows the weight of that question well.
Born to parents with Indian and Sikh roots, Kohli was raised in a predominantly White suburb in Virginia and often found the collectivism of her immigrant parents’ culture at odds with the individualism of the West, she writes in her new book “But What Will People Say? Navigating Mental Health, Identity, Love, and Family Between Cultures.”
The differences between the two …